6 REASONS WHY YOU SHOULDN’T KEEP YOUR CHILDS BABY TEETH, AND WHAT TO DO WITH THEM…

jewelry box of teeth
Jewelry box of teeth.

As a professional organizer for over 5 years, I feel very strongly about this topic…No one should keep their child’s baby teeth. 

Here’s why: 

  1. It’s gross, especially when I find them randomly rattling around a drawer like a sloppy serial killer’s trophy. 
  2. There’s no reason to keep them. No one really cares but you for about 60 seconds when you accidentally stumble upon them every couple of years and go “awwww!” If you do make a point to access these teeth a few times a year to show them off, you have a very polite group of friends and family. But do them a favor and stop. 
  3. People rarely know how to store them and they end up just rattling around a drawer. If you do buy some sort of box from Etsy or Amazon (not sponsored, but I would sell out in a second), then you have to store that box, most likely in another larger box, full of things you also probably shouldn’t be keeping. 
  4. Your children won’t care that you’ve kept their teeth. What will happen is that one day you’ll pass away and they’ll be stuck having to go through your home and decide what to keep and toss. And if you’ve stored baby teeth, there’s a good chance you’ve stored many other unnecessary items. So then your children, in their grief, will be forced to choose and feel guilty about throwing them away, even though they don’t want to have to store some teeth in their own home. Ultimately, if they don’t let their emotions sway them into keeping everything (that happens and it’s not good), if they are wisely thinking of their own children or landlord, they will be tossing those teeth in the trash, as well as the pretty little box they came in. 
  5. By tossing those teeth you will be saving space, time, and money. Space in your home that would be otherwise taken up by teeth. Time that you would have otherwise devoted to shopping for a box, boxing them, and boxing that box. Money because you won’t have to pay for storage of all your sentimental things or hire an organizer to help you make space and organizer those things. 
  6. You or someone else will ultimately end up throwing those teeth away. Think about it, if we all kept our relatives’ teeth, we’d have to have rooms solely devoted to storing teeth, teeth rooms…the stuff of nightmares. 

SOLUTION: Chuck those teeth into the backyard where they will be one with the earth and possibly used as a summer home for a family of fleas. 

bag of teeth
This guy must be raking it in

Instead of buying and storing stuff, what’s important is that you spend time with your children and set a good example with regard to the environmental effects of consumption and the byproduct of waste.  Not as fun for either of you as the tooth fairy, but that’s a creepy concept anyway, where your child’s only takeaway is five bucks and a subconsciously ingrained inability to fully trust you. (Stay tuned for my blog post on Christmas).

Debbie downer isn’t fun, dear reader, but she also isn’t wrong. 

Box of teeth
Box-o-Teeth

Please be sure to subscribe below for more bleak blog posts about what you’re doing wrong in life and how you’re contributing to the apocalypse.

Xoxo

Lisa Shields

P.S. Here’s a pretty good reason to keep teeth that I found after writing this article. Ha!

https://www.sunnyskyz.com/blog/1677/This-Is-Why-Doctors-Are-Telling-Parents-To-Keep-Their-Kids-Baby-Teeth

Please comment below if there are any other topics you’d like me to write about. 

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